Global Warming - Carbon buyouts

So, of the 100% of global CO<sub>2 released in the atmosphere only 30% is human made which includes our cars, electricity, farming, belches and farts.
The 70% leftover comes from natural plant decay, dying trees, natural forest fires and volcanoes.

Well, I Say:

Since the Old Medieval church's sin tax back in the 1200's, the carbon buyouts and carbon tax are the biggest scams ever devised in the history of Humanity to this day.
To effectively stop carbon emission we need to plug every volcanoes, remove all vegetation from earth and fart less!

That's some big crock of shit !</sub>

Obama 08 the Rock Star

So, the press is Star Struck with Obama !

Kabul, Afghanistan

By Agent Orange Blossom

On this day, Senator Obama visited Afghanistan.

Obama had breakfast with some troops earlier today, played some basketball and met with President Karzai. Obama later used the 4th stall in the second "Barack" surrounded by 22 armed guards and had a long pee lasting 77.62 seconds with 2 extra squirts followed by a gentle yet brisk shake. A guard, near the west wall reportedly heard a short sigh of relief form Obama's beautiful tenor like voice.

On his way out of Kabul, an Obamargency was declared at 14:07:17 GMT as the senator found 6 grains of sand embedded in his 5th set of underwear. The emergency was later resolved by 6 aides who had to use an electron microscope expressly flown from Germany to extricate the pesky micro-rocks form these priceless purple with green polka dots underpants given by his lovely wife Michelle Obama, an excellent lawyer with beautiful shiny hair, on their 187th kiss.

Senaror McCain had a nap today.

Well I say:

To the press of America, we are looking to choose a President, not the next top model.

Fair and Balance press...... in my underwear !!!

Apoc AL ypse GORE Does it Again

Fat Al Gore, again,  predicts the end of the USA as we know it unless we invest 3 Trillion Dollars "in Gore's private interests" in Solar and Wind energy to totally eliminate CO₂ emission.

Well, I Say:

Save the Environment:

End our Dependency on foreign oil !

Recycle fat people !

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PS: CO₂ is what feeds Vegetation; 

Why would environmentalists want to starve and kill what they love and worship so much ?

WMD in Iraq ....

I's good to know that, although according to the Democrats in Congress and Senate, the former leader of Iraq had no WMD and no nuclear ambitions,  the US government successfully very quietly moved 550 metric tons of yellow cake (Uranite U₃O₈) to Canada for reprocessing into nuclear fuel for power plants.

I thank President Bush for keeping us safe.

 

Well I Say:

 

Wake-up Democrats ...

Saddam Hussein did not plan to bake a gigantic 550 tons  lemon cake for the DNC !

It's time for the Democrats to get their heads out of the sand and accept the reality that President Bush was right, that the Iraq was justified and that our troops are doing an outstanding job even while being criticized by them knuckleheads democrats.

Offshore Drilling ?

President Bush, on this day, lifted the Offshore drilling ban; Good for him and good for us. Finally we have a US President which shows fiscal and environmental responsibilities.

As President Bush is aware that 65% of all oil spills are caused by natural seepage from untapped oil deposits, by allowing drilling, this will release the pressure of those deposits and substantially reduce those natural oil spills and furthermore reduce our oil dependency toward other countries.

Well I Say:

Democrat in Congress .. Stop exporting $800 Billion / year for oil to the middle East and be kind to the environment by preventing further oil spills.

Pelosi has finally a chance to make good on her promisses !